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Hot stock tip: Time to sell your shares in J.C. Dithers & Co.
Looks like end times are nigh for the company that has kept the Bumsteads out of the poorhouse for lo these many decades.Disturbing visions surface in Monday's episode of "Blondie." Not only are...
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No one seems to have told Mark Trail that journalism is dying
Ink-stained wretches should pray "Mark Trail" runs for decades to come. What other comic depicts journalists as well-adjusted, savvy and, most important, rich?Take Tuesday's episode of the do-gooder...
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The Bumsteads' dark secret: Their marriage is sexless
The only thing going on between the sheets in the home of Blondie and Dagwood Bumstead is snoring.In a sad comic that more or less confirms what many have thought for years, the two members of what...
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Will Mark Trail's new cartoonist take 'Mark Trail' in new directions?
Viva la revolution! After decades of abuse at the hands of writer Jack Elrod, Mark Trail finally has a new master. Will he give this namby-pamby woodsman a much-needed shot of testosterone?On Friday,...
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Substance abuse hits 'Family Circus' as Jeffy seems to be trying steroids
At last, the pudgy middle child in America's most above-board comics family is indulging in illicit substances - and he looks great!Yes, it's true, drugs can rip a family apart. But in Jeffy's...
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In abrupt reversal, Mark Trail longs for his wife
Has backwoods eunuch Mark Trail suddenly been taking boosters for his low testosterone?For years, Trail has ignored the many romantic come-ons of his long suffering spouse, Cherry. When she puts...
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Crumbling 'Cookie': Why the Bumsteads' daughter explores alternate lifestyles
Dagwood Bumstead has a lot on his plate: a terrible job, a meager salary and a severe overeating disorder. Now he's got something else to worry about: a teenage daughter whose sexual proclivities are...
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Sunday 'Shoe' Surprise: The birds of fowl comic discover they can fly!
The avian journalists of "Shoe" have long appeared to be as unhealthy as their human counterparts. They sit endlessly at desks, in a local diner or at a bar, resting, eating and drinking away their...
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Beetle Bailey: Is Ms. Buxley using - shudder - Botox?
And so it has come to this: A favorite funnies-page character has turned to chemical measures in a bid to thwart the ravages of age.For many comics fans, Ms. Buxley of "Beetle Bailey" has long been...
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Family Circus: This is how Jeffy learned to kill
Something's wrong with Jeffy.Little Jeffy from "Family Circus" has never been the most stable of characters. He is prone to extreme bouts of rage, likes to saunter about in the nude,and sometimes...
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The creator of 'Calvin and Hobbes' returns to draw for 'Pearls Before Swine'
The reclusive creator of landmark comic series "Calvin and Hobbes" has quietly returned to the funnies page he abandoned in 1995.Bill Watterson, the originator of "Calvin and Hobbes," surreptitiously...
View ArticleYou know hell's freezing over when Dennis the Menace talks like Justin Bieber
There are many signs of the apocalypse: A roiled stock market. A drumbeat of terrorist attacks and bombings conducted by remote drone. The announcement that a cable network will air a show called "Sex...
View ArticleBlondie and Dagwood: New sparks find way into loveless marriage
Here's a sight we thought we'd never see in the funny pages ever again: Blondie and Dagwood Bumstead, getting it on.For years, we've long felt the zip had gone out of this comics...
View ArticleAfter years of terrorizing jungle baddies, is the Phantom really about to die?
The Ghost Who Walks may be about to take a stroll off of this mortal plane.For weeks, the Phantom has been idling about while trying to shake off the effects of a snake bite while his trusty canine...
View ArticleThe Phantom - dead! Or: The Phantom - dead?
Our worst fears have been realized: In the jungle, the mighty jungle, the Phantom sleeps tonight.The 21st Phantom appears to have succumbed to a snakebite - and there's no word on who might become the...
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The Phantom lives - but he has quite a hangover
Was the Phantom poisoned or did he just have a really big bender?After making us think the Ghost Who Walks had shuffled off this mortal coil, cartoonist Paul Ryan has acknowledged he was just kidding...
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Little Elmo from 'Blondie' appears to have learning disabilities
At last, we now know why neighbor boy Elmo has been hanging 'round the Bumstead manse for lo these many decades when he should have graduated from law school by now: The kid can't read.The stark...
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Poorly-researched Comics Examiner survey: Funnies page for elderly, dying
Once a means of luring kids to the daily habit of reading a newspaper, the funnies page has now become a thing just for the elderly and digital illiterates, a flimsy survey of this morning's comics...
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Dick Tracy meets his most dastardly nemesis: Funky Winkerbean
When Dick Tracy encounters the criminal element, he typically tangles with villains whose names articulate the root of their inability to meld with society around them. Pruneface's wrinkly visage...
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Meet the hottest new fitness guru: Slyock Fox
One of the funnies page's most brilliant detectives is apparently on the hunt for a new career.Slylock Fox, that constantly chipper do-gooder who fights against con artists like Shady Shrew and Reeky...
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